For whatever reason, you haven't seen me since February. Not to be deterred. I am alive and well. In a manner of speaking. Feeling this pretty heavy right now.
"Yeah you're afraid of what you need. If you weren't, I don't know what we'd talk about." Thank you LCD soundsystem for accurately summing up my feelings.
I'm afraid that what I need is not what I currently have. And now that I know, I have to do something about it.